Title: Honestly, OK II
Author: Meghan
Email: Sugar14672@aol.com
Fandom: X-Men (movie)
Rating: PG
Summary: Logan thinks of the girl he left behind.
Song: I used some of the lyrics from "My All" by Mariah Carey
Category: Logans POV; Logan/Rogue romance...for now just alot of angst
Disclaimer: I don't own em
Comments: I don't know where I'm going with this..:) lol
Feedback: Please! I need feedback..preferable GOOD! Thanks!

Rain pelted down on his mangy leather jacket as the deep growl of the motorcycle beneath him echoed in the night. It was at least 3AM, and sleep was settling in his eyes...but his mind was set on much more important things.

He could feel it...feel her. The damn connection that burdened him most times. If he ever got in the middle of a fight...or dared to push the edge and go on his 8th beer..he could hear her in his mind, could already see her frowning at his self-demise. Secretly, he could feel her in the back of his mind...monitoring him..making sure he didn't get into too much trouble. Usually Logan would block her out....revel in his self-loathing. But, late at night he would close his eyes, breathe deeply, and try to look deep inside of her mind.

I am thinking of you
In my sleepless solitude
If it's wrong to love you
Then my heart just won't let me be right

It was stupid to still be suffering after all of this time....to still miss her...she had probably moved on...

Hell, by now she was grown-up....

It was stupid. He knew that it was. To still hold a flame for the young girl he had met all those years ago..but she was the first person he had ever really..loved, even if he couldn't voice his opinion.

His head was battling with his heart...she was like a sister to him, an innocent, deep...beautiful,sister who didn't judge him....

Stop it Logan.. he reprimanded.

'Cause I've drowned in you
And I won't pull through
Without you by my side

Cold air hit his exposed face, and sent a chilled shiver through him as soon as the cold, whipping, wind came in contact with his wet, matted hair. Who cared if he got pneumonia anyway..

It was true, the power to heal did come in handy.

Baby can you feel me
Imagining I'm looking in your eyes
I can see you clearly
vividly emblazoned in my mind

She was driving him on. It felt like he was doing this against his own will..but deep down he was turning into a giddy teenage boy, just thinking about seeing her again.

His heart throbbed though....he couldn't touch her...probably would never be able to touch her...

How badly he wanted to hold her....feel her smooth skin. And it was unbearable somedays.

Logan had to be tough...he had to be tough as nails. All of his life...well..that which he remembered...he had been a trouble-maker..had never needed anyone except himself.

These days though...just the thought of the young woman/child, Rogue, who had looked deeply into his eyes so long ago...made him pure putty. She had looked into his soul...and wasn't afraid.

No one had ever done that to him..no one would ever be able to do it again, and make him feel like she did.

It was true...the tough guy had a soft spot for Rogue.

And yet you're so far
Like a distant star
I'm wishing on tonight

Logan mentally convinced himself though, that he wasn't going back for her. He was -not- going back to see her again.....to fall back in love with her. He was just going...home. It had been long enough and it was time he went back...for how long, he wasn't sure.

Damn, who was he kidding...he could put up all of his walls and that kid would tear them down with one longing glance. Your such a wimp...

His hands brushed past the pocket of his leather jacket and he pulled out a small faded picture.

The young innocent features jumped out to him, and he felt himself become weak..mesmerized.

His little..Marie. Using her Nancy Drew skills she had found him at one point on his trip...sent him a picture. Must have thought he would forget her.

Impossible. She was the only thing that made him feel this way...made him feel practically human.

Darkness settled in behind the tree's, but Logan wouldn't stop.

Determination drove him on....His past was in the way of his future...and he needed to rebuild bridges before anything else.